Saturday, December 12, 2015
Wednesday, December 9, 2015
On Star Wars...
Turi: Dark Maul is Dark Vader's father
Minty: what about Light Vader?
Mr: there isn't a Light Vader
Minty: I've heard people talking about it
Mr [confused pause]: oh… you mean light saber!
Minty: I like Princess Layla
Upon finding a spider...
Me: don't stress! It's just a money spider. They bring you good luck
Turi: so they poop money?
Turi: Mum you should write a letter to santa and just ask for money
Me: Santa doesn't give money
Me: well you're not allowed to make money, that's called 'money laundering'. Remember we went to the mint? That's the only place you're allowed to make money. If someone else tries to make money they can go to prison
Minty: I've money laundered
Me: I suspect since your notes don't look very official you'll be ok
Turi: No one knows where santa is though
Me: so you think because he's well hidden he'll get away with it?
Today's photos by the Mr
Tuesday, December 8, 2015
Christmas is really quite strange when you think about it. On any other day of the year, if I asked you around for cocktails, fancy salads and a range of homemade ice creams you'd probably be stoked. But when I suggest that as a Christmas menu I am met with an uncomfortable pregnant silence that you might expect had I proposed that we kill the neighbour's cat and spit roast it for lunch. If you are one of my family members reading this and you're heading to mine for Christmas, relax and breathe. I'm totes going to cook a dead bird… or maybe glaze a pig leg and stud it with cloves (I've always thought they look rather pretty even though I don't actually like ham very much). And there will be a pudding. I've accepted that I am alone in wanting to radicalise Christmas, so I'll resist the urge to serve you up guacamole and a christmas taco! But just be warned that I'm not an experienced roaster of meat so be kind if you arrive to find me wearing the turkey on my head like Mr. Bean. Oh and there will be plenty of homemade ice-cream because… ice-cream. Enough said.
We went berry picking with friends this weekend. No prizes for guessing what went into my first batch of ice-cream!
Wednesday, December 2, 2015
It's only the second of December but already Advent has been fraught. Last night Turi announced he doesn't believe in Santa anymore. Apparently it 'doesn't make any sense' that there could be such a thing as actual reindeer as well as magical ones, and if Santa doesn't live in space and the North Pole is a real place we should just be able to visit there and check it out. Plus the whole 'visit everyone in one night' is apparently problematic. The Elf on the Shelf also copped a barrage of criticism because he couldn't possibly be real since his hair doesn't move. Hello, has he seen Osher Gunsberg? The whole thing has shaken me to my core. The kid is only just six. Christmas magic should still be well and truly alive, not being crushed with a logic hammer.
Despite his crisis of faith Turi decided he would still place an 'order' with Santa (sometimes described as a letter by less demanding children). Presumably he is hedging his bets. The extremely grumpy face in the first picture occurred because I made him revise his list. He is holding the original list in the second picture. The crosses indicate items I told him he wasn't allowed to have. Possibly a nicer mother would have left them on the list but I'd rather get the sad face over and done with now than save it for Christmas morning.
Minty took a logical, investigative approach to the issues raised by Turi's scepticism and requested 'more information' and photographic evidence of the elf in the workshop. I sense some serious late night photoshopping in my future. And possibly an even greater problem to solve before Christmas arrives: what the heck is a 'choochoo'??!
Dear Santa-Claus, I hope you have a Merry Christmas. I would like on my list a Smiggle diary if you have one and a monster high doll if you have one, a calm colouring book if you have one and a violin if you have one and I would like some more information about Alfie the elf and I would like a picture of you and your elf at your work shop. And 3 candy canes and 2 choochoos. From Minty
Posted by Susan at 5:27 PM